Article by Jane Killian

Jane Killian has been personal training women for 13 years. Through the years of listening to what they really want and feel, she’s learnt that almost everyone didn’t feel good enough in some way. She realized that we need to work on the inside more than the outside – what good is looking amazing but not feeling amazing? Jane created a self-love coaching brand, Unselfishly Me, through which she’s able to help so many women to love themselves a little more, so that it impacts their whole life as they finally feel good enough.

Everyone deserves to be healthy. You are worthy of good health, happiness, love and abundance. Everyone is. The key to knowing you deserve these things is to believe it, but it needs to come from within. Your mind only believes what you say, not what others say. You need to work on giving yourself compliments and work on loving yourself so that your mind believes you. If self love sounds like it’s too far away from what you’re capable of, how about we work on self-respect? Can you respect your body a little bit more? Can you respect yourself enough to make a few minutes a day to do something to help your mental health? Can you respect yourself more to cut that toxic person out of your life? How about you start with that? Through respecting yourself more you’ll start feeling different and you’ll start realizing that you do deserve more. You’ll get a bit more self-esteem, and a bit more and a bit more until you realize that you are worthy of great things.

It’s hard to try and get healthy when your head isn’t in the right place. Your mental health is so important in your health journey. At the same time, starting a healthy journey can impact your mental health, so it really goes hand in hand. Take time out for yourself to go for a 30-minute walk with a nice podcast. This helps to get you moving and helps to clear your mind and helps your mental health. If you start with 3 times a week you can eventually build up to 5 times a week and it becomes just as important for clearing your mind as it does for your health.

Self love is putting yourself first. It’s showing up for yourself. It’s putting your health and happiness first. It’s making time to do the things that spark joy in your life. It’s making time to be healthy in whatever way that means for you. It’s looking after yourself. It’s knowing that you deserve all these things and you can do them guilt free.

Not everyone wants to be healthy and exercise, and that is perfectly fine, but you should know that you are worthy of these things, even if you’re not quite there yet.

This is the only body you get, for this one lifetime. So how about you treat it kindly and love it a bit more? Your mind hears everything you say, so start changing that dialogue. Start speaking kindly to yourself, even if you don’t believe it at first. This is your one true home, make it a happy one!

Loving your body is a tough task, but if you try to just show your body a little bit more respect each day, the love will come!

How to Start Practising Self Love

Speak kindly to yourself 

Every time you say something mean about yourself to others or to yourself in your head or the mirror, stop and replace it with something kind.

Look in the mirror every day and give yourself at least one compliment 

This should be physical but if you’re battling with that, start off by saying how cute you look in that outfit.

Change your phone wallpaper 

Instead of having that gym girl as your wallpaper for motivation, change it to a quote about self-love and kindness.

Go through your Instagram and unfollow people that make you feel unworthy 

That fitness model you follow for inspiration? How is that working for you? If you eye roll every time you see her post and don’t feel a sense of calm and joy when you see her name or picture, unfollow!

Go subscribe to positive podcasts!

Subscribe and download episodes so that you can listen in the car, and on a walk. Find something that uplifts you. (Here’s my podcast)

Get outside

Try and go for a podcast walk 3 times a week to clear your head and make ME time for yourself. You need to learn to love yourself by spending time with yourself. Start with that.

If you need more help on this journey, you can join my 8-week self-love e-course, Unselfishly Me. We have new courses starting every two months and I’d love you to join us! It’s delivered to your email each week for you to work through during the week. We have podcasts, videos, meditations, journal prompts, and mantras all themed each week. To find out more information head to or email I also offer one-on-one Self Love and Life Coaching as well.

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